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A Pumpkin Workout | Are you kidding me?


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pumpkin workoutOK, I know it’s only Tuesday and not a regular posting day, but I saw a “news” story that just made me laugh so hard I almost cried.  Then I realized this was a serious story and there is a TON of press on it right now.  If you haven’t already heard, it seems the Pumpkin Workout is all the rage this year.  Apparently, you have to find a pumpkin with some mass to it and a good strong stem.  Then you go through a normal full body workout using the pumpkin as a medicine ball or kettlebell.  I guess it’s fine if that sort of thing spins your propeller.  But what gimmicks are you going to use the rest of the year to get your lazy bum off the couch for some exercise?




Here are a few ideas for the rest of the year…

Winter: The Snow Man Workout – Get your kids, or neighbor’s kids to build a snow man around your body.  Then you do a normal full body workout routine packed in snow.  For best results, buy a second hand warm-up suit 3 or 4 sizes too big and pack the snow inside it next to your body.  The extra cold will help speed up your metabolism and you will burn fat like a locomotive burns coal.

Spring: The Compost Pile – Planting a garden?  Grab your warm-up / snow-holding suit from The Snow Man Workout, and put it to good use once again.  Don’t be lazy when moving your compost form the pile to the garden and use that wheelbarrow.  Pack it into your suit and do walking lunges all the way to the garden stopping every 5 counts to do 10 push-ups.  Then when you get to the garden, do jumping jacks moving around to spread the compost.

Summer: The Clean Yard Workout – You should still have your over-sized warm-up suit and hopefully you have cleaned out all the compost.  You’ll need it again for this one.  First, if you have a riding lawn-mower, sell it.  Take the money and buy an old fashioned un-powered rotary mower.  You know, the kind Beaver used on Leave it to Beaver.  Now, set the blades to the tallest setting so that it is only taking the very tippy-tops off your grass.  As you cut the lawn, don’t leave any clippings behind.  Pick them up and put them into your suit.  This is a circuit routine, so once you make a pass over your entire yard, lower the setting of the blades and do it all again.  When your suit is full, do lunges all the way to your compost pile to dump out your suit.  If you don’t have a compost pile, do jumping jacks across your neighbor’s yard.

Seriously my friends, there is no gimmick that will substitute for simple motivation and determination.  I am all for keeping your bodyweight routines fresh and interesting.  That’s why I post the weekend challenge every Friday.  But I have to be honest with you.  If you are paying some trainer to tell you to go out and buy a pumpkin to workout with, then, well, maybe you need to rethink your exercise goals.

So, I’m sorry if I offended you, and if I didn’t, then thank you for reading.  And if I did, I thank you for reading too.  Wednesday’s post will still come on time.  After all, aren’t even just a little bit curious about Danny’s dilemma?   Talk to you tomorrow and remember, pumpkins are for Jack-O-Lanterns, pies and baking, not for slinging around your workout space.

Janos “non-pumpkin slinger” Kovacs



One Response to “A Pumpkin Workout | Are you kidding me?”

  1. Brayn says:

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    Love the pic,

    Like how you related the seasons into workouts.

    Bryan C.

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